I Can't, Won't and Don't Want To Do It For You

Let's face it, most people are lazy. That's it - flat out lazy. While there is the percentage of the population out there who have valid reasons and problems as to why they can't eat better or workout, the majority of people are lazy and/or just making excuses. Someone who spends half their time watching television, playing video games and going to the bar - then turns around and says they don't have time to workout is making excuses. You have time, you're just not devoting it to a workout and you're not fooling anyone. A single mom who works two full time jobs just to keep food on the table and clothes on her kids' backs who has just enough time to get home and fix them dinner, sleep for a few hours just to wake up and get them ready for another day - SHE has no time to workout.

Let's be clear - people who make fitness and health a priority in their life do it on purpose. They MAKE the time to workout, they spend their money on healthy things instead of junk which is how they can afford it. They don't waste time sitting around playing in virtual reality for hours at a time while consuming thousands of calories. People who make fitness a priority fight mini battles every day. You think I don't want pizza and brownies all the time? You think that given the chance I wouldn't eat Chinese food all day long? If it were possible to LIVE off of french fries and chocolate with no health side effects, there's no question that that's the life I'd be living. But I don't do any of that. I've made a decision that being fit is more important to me than any of these things. That doesn't mean the desire to eat bad things goes away. On the contrary, it's a little voice inside me that I have to argue with daily. Eating french fries every once in a while? Yeah, sure - I'm ok with that personally. Eating them every day? That's basically daring God to give you a heart attack or heart disease.

I'm always happy to help others find their way in fitness. It can be a big, strange, confusing world for anyone who isn't used to living this way. I get it. So I'll always give you tips, pointers and step-by-step guides on how to get involved. I will answer any questions that come up, help you understand why what you're doing matters and make lots of suggestions to help you find a way to get fitter and even like what you're doing. I can be your sounding board, an ear to listen and a voice of reason.

What I can't, won't and surely do not want to do is do it for you.

I can't even count the number of people who have asked for help, received it - and then done NOTHING. Absolutely nothing. Made no changes to their lifestyle whatsoever, not even the small ones. Yet they will continue to feel bad about themselves and complain. Where did people get this notion that they could sit back and let someone else do the work for them to benefit from? Who even takes pride in that? Everyone wants a magic pill or a miracle to make them be able to keep doing the same thing they're doing, yet SOMEHOW magically lose weight by changing nothing. Are you serious? Do you understand the amount of effort that I have to put into my fitness daily? Why would I do that two-fold for you even if that were possible?

Why is it that working for something is no longer valued? Our country is built on the principles of bravery and fighting for what you want. Where did that go? Why are so many so unwilling to put forth a little effort to get what they say they want?

I don't know the answers and I can't understand that mindset. I've always been the kind of person to go after what she wants and if you don't get it - SO WHAT - at least you tried. And at least you know you tried. Which is better than failing as a result of making no effort whatsoever. I'd rather do my best and make my best effort and take pride in knowing that I'm doing all I can. I certainly don't sit on the sidelines and wish, hope and pray that someone else will do it for me - because guess what? They won't.

You can do it, and I can help you - but I refuse to do it for you.

xoxo,
 Sweet C

The Keys To My Weight Loss Success

So many people ask me questions about my weight loss success. What did you do? How do you get motivated? Where do I start? What do I eat?

The answers to these questions really aren't that complicated. At least not for me. My motivation? Simple. I don't want to be fat ever again. I want to look in the mirror and like what I see. That's all the motivation I need. Where to start? Just start. You know the basics - start with that. Stop eating crap. Now. Stop buying crap to eat. Workout. Do any workout -  it doesn't matter which one. Do something rather than nothing.

The bigger question is - how? Here are my essentials - the things that I know I must do for success.

1) DO THE WORK
I don't have a problem with complaining. I complain all the time. But you earn the right to complain by putting in the work. You don't get to complain about how hard it is or how inconvenient it is unless you're doing it. If you're too lazy to make an effort - then stay fat and shut up about it. Don't complain if you're not putting in effort. What's the work?

Work out 6 days a week.
Log what you eat - all of it.
Eat clean. Cheat minimally. Don't dwell on the cheat - move on.

That's really it. That's the core of it. Learn to master these things and you'll see results. You don't have to perfect right out the gate. I've done this for a decade and I'm still not perfect. Just do your best and keep making your best better. Don't wanna log your food? Don't wanna work out? Fine - don't. But stop complaining that you can't lose weight.

2) LEARN & GROW
You know what cutting carbs did for me? Nothing. Jack squat. My body was not impressed. You know what eating from the top two tiers of Michi's Ladder did for me? I lost 5 lbs. Learn what works for your body by trying it. You can't gauge your own success by someone else's. You are not them. Don't wish you were, just find out what works for you. If one diet and one workout worked for every body - there wouldn't be so many different ones to choose from. Find what works for YOU. But don't just try one thing then give up. Don't be lazy.

3) DO NOT QUIT
Losing weight isn't easy and results don't happen overnight. If this were the case - then no one would have weight problems. If I stopped trying just because I didn't see results quickly - I wouldn't be where I am. If you really want to see results - you have to keep going. Getting fit is not something you do for a while and then you're done forever. IT'S A LIFESTYLE CHANGE. You have to know what's helpful for your body and what's harmful. I'm not gonna lie - I still love me some french fries and pizza and chicken nuggets. I know the bad crap that's in fast food and I find it delicious anyway. However, I can count on one hand the number of times I'll actually get fast food in the course of a month ... a few months at that. A year's time - that's probably both hands. Point is - it's not as often as it used to be.

Bottom line is - JUST TRY. Make an effort. Don't talk about it, be about it. Get off your butt, and do what you know you need to. Once you start and see the fruits of your labor - it makes it easier to continue because you'll want to continue seeing the results! Make a plan. What can you do right now that will put you on a better path? Need help? Send me a message and we'll make a plan together!

xoxo,
Sweet Charity

Nobody's Perfect

Too many people have this idea in their head that if they can't hit their diet and exercise PERFECTLY, then there's no point in doing it all. I don't really understand this mentality at all, but there are so many people who feel this way. I have some friends who say:

Well, since I ate so poorly today - I didn't see the point in working out.

And then there's people who get so down on themselves because they slipped up and ate something bad, that they completely tank their whole diet because of ONE slip up:

I was doing so well, but then I had french fries and then 3 scoops of ice cream, and the next day I had a burger and I just couldn't stop eating bad stuff!

People also beat themselves up about working out:

I only did 30 minutes in the gym today. I'll never be thin :(

I didn't get to my workout today, what is wrong with me?!?

If any of these people sound like you at one time or another, this is my plea to you to

STOP!

Stop beating yourself up for little mistakes.
Stop thinking that just because you didn't do it perfectly, it doesn't count.
Stop expecting yourself to change overnight.
Stop expecting to see results in a matter of days - that's not realistic.
STOP being negative, period!

If you have a negative mentality towards any aspect of diet or exercise - it increases the likelihood that you will fail. You can not beat yourself up over every little thing. People who are fit and lead healthy lifestyles didn't get that way by being perfect. They got that way by being consistent. They did not let small setbacks completely de-reail them from reaching their goals. If you eat poorly one day - SO WHAT?! You know that you ate poorly - that doesn't mean that one day has to turn into one week and one month. It was one day of your life. MOVE ON. You recognize the bad behavior, you learn from it and then you change it. And when you do slip up and eat poorly - that is all the more reason to work out!!! You need to try to cancel out as many calories as you can. Even if the result of that workout won't be a drop in pounds, at least it will help you from gaining weight which would be a step in the wrong direction.

Life happens. Sometimes you just won't be able to resist that piece of cake. Sometime, you won't be prepared and you'll buy fast food. Sometime - you just won't have time to get to your workout. These are all normal things that you should not feel horrible about. What you should do - is pay attention to why it happened, and plan to not let it happen again. Could you have prepared your lunch the night before so that you had it to take with you instead of buying fast food? If you scheduled your workout in your day the way you schedule work and schedule watching your favorite TV, would you have missed it?

Think positively and speak positively to yourself. Pep-talk yourself! If it's not something you would say to your best friend in the world, you shouldn't say it to yourself. Would you ever tell your BFF - you're such an idiot! I can't believe you did that! ? Then don't say it to you. Instead, say to yourself - ok, I'm definitely gonna do some extra cardio to make up for that slice of cake! Or, I am absolutely packing and bringing my lunch tomorrow!

Nobody's perfect. No one gets it right 100% of the time. But if you shoot for 100% consistently, I guarantee you'll at least land in the 90th percentile. This week alone, I've gone off my eating plan - twice! Did I beat myself up over it? Absolutely not. Did I adjust my weekly calorie intake around it AND do a few extra workouts? You bet I did. And if it results in a slight setback for me this week - then that's the price I'll have to pay. I'll learn from the experience, and figure out a better way to resist the temptation the next time. I'm not gonna stop working out and I'm not gonna pig out and eat everything in sight. I'm going to stick to my clean eating plan and daily workouts because that consistency is what has led to lasting weight loss for me. It's not being perfect every step of the way that gets you results, it's continuing on your journey - no matter what that will get you there.

xoxo,
 Sweet Charity

Step Outside Your Little Box

I think it's easy for us to get so stuck in something, that we are very relectant to change. Even when we complain that we don't like the way things are going, we don't always want to switch things up because "what if it starts working?" I recently had a friend help me change my resume since I've been getting very little if any response to what I've been sending out. For the most part, it was more format changing than content. I liked the new look and everything, I was just kind of being lazy to use it. I already had my old one saved to my computer and in my e-mail. It was just "easier" to continue to send that one out. But I finally sucked it up and made the necessary changes to start using the new one. To my surprise, I actually heard back from a job I applied to. Was it the new resume layout? Who's to say? The point is - I wanted a change, I asked for and accepted help and gave the change a try.

I find a lot of people are in the same boat. They don't like the way things are going, they ask for help and feedback and suggestions - and then don't make any changes. Because they're scared, lazy, or want to wait until what they're doing works. How stupid is that? I can't tell you how many people I know have had diet/exercise questions ~ I have given them advice of things that have worked for me ~ and they respond with "well this is what I'm doing so I'm going to stick with that for a while." I'm thinking "hello? Did you not just say that wasn't working? Why would you continue to do what you know isn't working?!" But in the end, I can't change things for you. If you want to continue on doing something you yourself said wasn't doing it for you, that's up to you.

The thing is, most adjustments aren't permanent. Why don't you just try one of the suggestions you've been given and if after a week .... two weeks it doesn't work, then don't do it anymore. What have you got to lose? If you've already conceded that what you are doing isn't working, what will it hurt to try something else? It's certainly a better idea than continuing to complain and ask for advice that you will never take.

xoxo,
sweet charity
<3