You're Allowed To Feel Good About Yourself For No Reason At All

        It's funny that I always seem to have my "skinny days" on the days leading up to that time of the month. You know a skinny day - when for no particular reason at all, you are just feeling like "hey, maybe I'm not such a whale after all!" Well, I noticed something interesting on my most recent "skinny day." I walked past a mirror (not even a skinny mirror) and thought "Wow, I look better than I expected considering I ate oreo ice cream last night. Wonder if I'm actually losing weight or if I just dressed well today. I should get on the scale to see...."

        Seriously people? Am I the only one? I know I'm not. WTF is wrong with us? Honestly, re-read that situation and really take a moment to think about the nonsense thinking that can happen inside our heads. I looked in the mirror, I felt good about what I saw - but somehow needed to validate that I was allowed to feel that way by backing it up with proof. It wasn't enough to just feel great about myself. Nope. Only allowed to feel good if you actually lost a pound! Not to mention that I was probably heavier than normal due to my impending menstruation. Most likely bloated too. However, I clearly didn't FEEL that way at that moment. I felt great! So why was my first thought that I HAD to verify that by checking the facts?

       It is so easy to make getting fit a numbers game. Counting calories, measuring inches, pounds on the scale... these are all important aspects, but why are they the end all be all? News flash: they aren't. Having a skinny day and feeling great about yourself is an awesome accomplishment in and of itself. It doesn't need to be proven by numbers on a scale or a tape measure. I am learning now to appreciate my "skinny days" and just be happy that I'm in a place where I feel good about myself more often than I feel like a whale. And no, I don't need anything outside of myself to validate that feeling - and neither do you.

xoxo,
 Sweet C

What's The Deal With You and the Scale?

Alright people, this is the hot button issue when it comes to people trying to get in better shape. I understand that in our country "weight loss" is most easily measured with a scale. We also quickly feed our hunger with unhealthy foods and expect every solution to come instantly in the form of a pill, technology or the push of a button. If we're already getting so many things wrong, why do you expect the most popular measure of weight loss to be any different?

What do you mean exactly when you say you want to "lose weight?" Do you only mean that you want the numbers on the scale to go down? Let's say I tamper with your scale in the middle of the night. And every week the numbers go down steadily, but your actual body never changes because it's just me messing with your scale. Would that make you happier? The fact that a machine is telling you you're consistently losing weight although you're not actually losing anything?

By "losing weight" do you mean that you want less physical fat on your body and you want to fit into smaller clothes? Because when you lose inches, that's what's happening. Your body is getting physically smaller. This option is definitely the one that I am concerned with. In fact, I don't even use the term "lose weight" anymore because my actual weight on a scale is circumstancial. I'm just trying to get fitter and drop my body fat percentage. I'm really not so concerned with what a little box tells me so long as my clothing and my reflection are doing what I want.

Do you realize that you've been TAUGHT to rely on a scale? The same way we're taught what beauty is, what's in fashion and who we should love. These are all influenced by the environment you live and grow up in. If such a unit of measurement as the scale did not exist, how would you measure your progress? If you could only  judge by your reflection and your clothes, what would be more important to you then - the inches or the pounds? When you stop and think about it, what difference does it make how much you weigh? Do people regularly pick you up? Unless you're a cheerleader or dancer, I would highly doubt that you are lifted by strangers on a regular basis. Do people regularly see your actual physical shape? Because when you lose inches - THAT is the change that gets noticed. The scale just gives you a little number that only you and your doctor know. You're not required to tell anyone what it is and even if you are, you can lie about it. You can't lie about your physical shape. In fact, you may have actually lost ten pounds - but if your body doesn't show it and you tell me you did, I'll think you're lying anyway. So really, what did those ten pounds get you? If you told me you lost ten inches - that's something that would show on you.

I know that in most people's brains, logic says that losing inches should equal losing pounds too. Let me clue you in - YOUR LOGIC IS WRONG. Plain and simple. Losing inches does not equal losing pounds and getting smaller does not always equal losing pounds. I can tell you that I have been two completely different dress sizes at the exact same number on the scale. I don't even know what scale numbers mean anymore. You can take 5 people who all weigh the exact same amount and stand them next to each other and they will look nothing alike. Some may be fit, some may be fat - they'd all weigh the same but look completely different. Because a scale number isn't telling you much. It doesn't tell you what's muscle and what's fat - and believe me that makes a huge difference. It doesn't tell you what size pants you'll fit into.

5lbs. of FAT vs. 5lbs. of MUSCLE. Which one takes up less space? Both show up as 5lbs. on a scale. 

You need to un-teach yourself what you've learned. Stop relying on the scale as your main measure of progress because you will miss the actual progress you're making. You should never make the statement "I'm losing inches and my clothes are getting bigger and I see definition BUT the numbers on the scale...." This is the one statement that makes me crazier than any other. It names all of the things that people typically set out on a weight loss journey for - all of the progress is happening right there. But people are SO caught up in stupid little numbers from a stupid little box that they completely ignore all of their actual progress for something that doesn't actually measure progress. Completely.Ridiculous.

I know that many of you who read this will continue to obsess over your scale. My sincere hope for you is that  one day you will look up and look for your progress where it matters as opposed to staying obsessed with a number you've been taught to obsess over. If this post describes you, please stop. Please throw your scale away and never look back. Please only weigh yourself when you go to the doctor and even then - take into account the fact that you're wearing clothes (hopefully) & have food and liquid in your body. If you're looking the way you want to, if you're losing inches of body fat and getting lean muscle, if your clothes are starting to fit better or get bigger - please, please, please congratulate yourself on ACTUAL progress and stop looking to inanimate objects to give you useless information.

My Thoughts On The Scale

I am quickly realizing that diet and weight loss can make you crazy. I know this about myself, but apparently it is universally true. At least I don't feel so alone. My paranoia is not mine alone. Now that I recognize that I have the problem, I am able to work on it. I am happy to say that I am no longer a slave to my scale. Yes, I still use it and I still weigh in - but I do not freak out when it doesn't do what I want.

I have read soooo many posts by people whose focus is entirely on the scale. So much so, that they miss the ENTIRE point of what they're doing, which was to drop some pant sizes. Unfortunately, the scale is the most widely accepted unit of measurement for weight loss. And I suppose that has something to do with the fact that what we refer to as wanting to get in better shape is "weight loss" as opposed to saying that we want to "get fit" or "get in shape." The truth of the matter is - getting fit does not always equal losing weight. At a certain point, getting fit could equal gaining weight. It depends on what you're doing, how you're doing it and what your ultimate goal is.

It is absolutely bonkers to me that some people are losing inches, feeling better, looking better and their clothes are starting to fall of of them - yet ALL they care about are the numbers on the scale. Do you know how crazy that sounds?! So, let me get this straight - your body is getting smaller, your clothes are getting too big, your muscles are getting defined, but you're upset because if someone tried to physically pick you up right now - you wouldn't be as "light" as you wanted to be?

That.Is.Crazy.

What if the scale didn't exist? What if it wasn't the most widely recognized unit of measurement for weight loss progress? What if the tape measure was the only progress indicator you had aside from what you could see in the mirror and feel in your clothes? How important would your physical mass be then? I understand that we all want to be smaller in numbers on the scale, but seriously? You can't ignore all the other signs of your progress and bank it ALL on three numbers that have less to do with your progress and more to do with whether or not you're bloated that day.

If you are trying to get fit, having a scale is kind of like having chocolate around. If you can handle having chocolate around you without feeling the need to consume it all the time - then you're ok. If you do consume it a little more than you should, but you're ok with dealing with those consequences - then fine. But if having chocolate around you means you'll devour it and then feel completely horrible afterwards, then DON'T have chocolate around you!
Same with your scale.
If you can keep your scale, but use it only as one of many indicators of your progress - ok. If you use it out of curiosity but don't freak out every time you look at it - great. If you're so consumed with the number it gives you that you truly don't recognize losing inches as more quantifiable progress than losing pounds - it's time for you to put the scale away. Or be put in a crazy house.

xoxo,
Sweet Charity