Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Bubble Girl

I function in a bubble. I have a set routine that makes it easy to stick to eating clean and working out because I do things the same way all the time. I have set hours that I'm at work, based around those hours - I have set meal times and a set time to work out. I go food shopping on the same day of the week every week and I prep my meals on the weekends. Organization and routine is basically what I thrive on and I get extremely upset when that routine is disturbed. I am as far from spontaneous as you can get. In fact, most of my friends know that when they want me to hang out or do something with them - I need a minimum of a week's notice. I need to be able to put it in my schedule and still plan around it. And if they think I'm going out every single weekend, that's just not happening. I actually get a lot of things done on the weekends and I just can't spend each one doing things that aren't in line with my goals and priorities. Eating out and drinking every weekend when you're trying to lose weight and save money is just not a smart move.

Well, this weekend was one of my few-and-far-between outings. A friend of mine will be moving to another country soon and she had her going away party about 3 hours away from where I live. This meant it would be an overnight excursion and a definite change in my routine. When I plan these events into my schedule - I place them in as a planned cheat meal. Since I only do it about once a month, I don't feel bad about letting loose with friends. So, at least that part's taken care of. But, I also realized a few things.

I don't particularly care what people have to say about how I look or dress. Most days, I'm in workout gear because it's easier to have it on and ready for my workouts. But after my workout was done and I was ready to head out, I wondered for a moment if I was appropriately dressed for the public. Once again - not that I care, but there are so few times that I'm actually going out to socialize with people - it felt very strange to get dressed not for an event, and not for working out - but just to go see people that I knew. I wore leggings, a tank top and boots. An overall very form fitting ensemble. I was actually really proud of how I looked because a few years ago, there was no way that this is how this particular ensemble would have looked on me.

And suddenly it dawned on me - THIS was what all the work I'd been doing in my bubble was for. This is why I spend so much of my time sticking to my routine and working hard. So that on the occasions where I DO come out of my bubble - I can feel this happy and confident about all I've done. So I can wear what I want and feel good about it. So I can have some drinks with friends and going away party cake and not beat myself up for it. THIS is the reason for the bubble.

It kind of helped me remember to not get too wrapped up in this weight loss thing. If you put too much focus on it, it will make you crazy. I mean, what's the point in doing all this work if you don't get to show it off? It's fun coming out of the bubble once in a while, so long as you don't let it completely derail your progress. I definitely indulged more than I should have this weekend, and perhaps that's because I'm not out of my bubble often enough. But that's something I can learn from and work on. I'm back on track now, so once again - it's no reason to freak out. This journey is all about living and learning and trying - not being perfect.


  1. Great job! I found you on thatsfit.com and I've been reading your blog. Great stuff! Inspiring, when I need to be inspired. Thank you! And way to go, you look amazing!

  2. Thanks so much AJ - much appreciated!